Monday, March 03, 2008

The Conversation

It was on that Friday night that I realized many things and with this entry, I'll tell you all about it.

Last Friday, I had dinner with AJ and Papi. Then the unevitable topic was reached - relationships. AJ and Papi have their girls back home. AJ has a wonderful girlfriend back in the Philippines and Papi has this sweet wife back in Dominican Republic. One by one, they told me about that special moment - that moment that solidified their relationships, that moment that confirmed and glorified their relationships.

I am single yes I am. Am I proud of it? In some ways yes, in some ways no. I guess I really am not lucky in this aspect of my life. Sometimes I tell myself, "What the heck, I'll just forget about it and concentrate on other aspects." But deep down, I know I cannot. A part of me is yearning for a glorification of this part of my life - to love someone that deeply and to be loved back the same way. Not the "so-so" love but the real thing.

I am lucky to have met these friends of mine who have been giving me good advice. Do you know what they told me? They told me to PRAY. And I realized, I haven't really asked God for my ideal guy. I haven't told Him what I really desired. Of all people I haven't spoken to, I missed telling Him and it broke my heart realizing that.

What I maybe asking Him is too much. I am already very lucky to have a great family and an amazing set of friends. I have already offered my life to my family, but I realized I have to sprinkle this part of my life too and have it bloom in ways that could make me happy.

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